The Anthropocene

Shall I revisit my old, faithful, neglected blog?
Why not?

I am feeling frustrated today.  The morning began with a baby mouse stuck on a sticky-trap in the kitchen.  A STICKY TRAP?? REALLY?? Are we barbarians??  My idiot, selfish, ignorant roommate bought sticky traps for the "mouse problem."  And I awoke to find a perfectly coherent baby mouse stuck to one, all four paws and his jaw, still fully conscious and squeeking.  So.... my roommate tells me to put it in a bag and throw it in the trash.  So I do.  This is obviously a cruel, cruel, evil, evil thing to do and I am THE BIGGEST softy with animals, so what's my internal plan?  To retrieve it from the trash in secret, somehow free it from it's sticky prison, and LET IT GO OUTSIDE!! What do I care if it comes back in the house? (I don't).  Or gets eaten by a cat? (That's at least a TAD more natural of a death).  Will I have it perish in absolute fear, all-fours stuck to a hellish goo? NO.  So my roommate comes to ask if I threw it out, I say yes, we both talk about how bad we feel for it (different roommate than bought the sticky traps), and how we need to not use sticky traps anymore.  She says she is going to have our other roommate squish it to put it out of it's misery.  Yes, good idea, obviously preferable to having it suffocate in the dark of the trashcan on the sticky trap.  But now there's no way for me to rescue it.  I am too embarrassed to speak up and say I want to free it, and she doesn't want it released outside because it will come right back in (which it will).  So I agree,  And roommate #4 goes outside and squishes it.  And now baby mouse is dead.  And I feel terrible.  And angry. And guilty.  I don't know that I could have actually saved it, the trap was EXTREMELY sticky.  But I could have tried.  And that has set the tone for the day.
(The incident was followed rapidly by me leaving the house for work, trying to get coffee at Dunkin' Donuts, driving around the block to go the "fast way" and getting stuck at several traffic lights, only to see that the parking lot is packed with Drive-Thruers and ambulances (??) and forcing me to abandon my decaf;  Which is for the best- I (and everyone) do not need the chemical nonsense served by Dunkin' Donuts.  A second, less dramatic failure (success?) for the morning).

Ok so I'm at work, emotionally healing myself from the mouse ordeal, finding solace in the fact that baby has joined the spirit world.  Trying not to think about what an exciting winter he might have had, scurrying through leaves, hoarding his little seeds and crumbs, making brave escapes from the neighbors' cats.  (Ridiculous, obviously.  Sort of.  Romantacized.  But... Alas.  He could have had a life, nonetheless).

*Well, several hours have passed so I'm feeling a bit less frustrated.  Not less sad about my poor mouse friend, but I've had other things to do and managed not to dwell on it too much.  Nothing like distraction to make you forget your woes.

That being said, the other avenue of my frustration was--of course--stress and anxiety and grief and anger over environmental issues.  That is constant with me, of course, but more pronounced at some times than others.  I was recently introduced to Story Maps as a means of information dissemination, interactive presentations with all types of media, fact sharing, general "storytelling" about a specific topic, and watched one this morning on "The Age of Humans."  It was relatively simple, focusing on basic facts about what humans have done to the planet and showing (awesome) GIS maps on specific topics--satellite images of population density in certain cities, land percentage lost to agriculture, removed forest area, etc.  I thought it was a really really good, informative presentation and shared it on Facebook.  Of course, no one will react to a post like that.  It's not juicy enough, and no one (at least that I'm friends with) has time to look at something of that nature.  They're too preoccupied with Ferguson (don't get me wrong... that's important :/ ), promoting their art businesses, pictures of their well-crafted dinners, Buzzfeed, and so on.  WHY DOES NOBODY CARE ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT?!?!?!??! I must really and truly live in the wrong place.  I feel like I can't connect to ANYBODY about my insights, worries, sadness, goals, plans, anything  because nobody I know has any interest whatsoever, the theme of my perspective is simply not shared and apparently not understood.  I guess people are right when they say the southeast is a little behind...

I just want to be connected with people that think for themselves, that are TRULY open-minded (no, not that you support gay rights and have a vague notion of the dangers of GMOs are and superficially disagree with CAFOs).  People that ACTIVELY QUESTION THINGS THAT DON'T MAKE SENSE.  That comprehend that our society is not simple and straight-forward and credible at face-value but that there is much much much more going on behind the scenes of easily-accessible media, behind front-page news and generally accepted ideologies.  STOP! BEING! A! ZOMBIE! STOP! SWALLOWING! ALL! THE! BULLSHIT!

Ugh. My frustration levels have risen again.  Is writing blog posts supposed to make you seethe with anger??

  (Probably).

I am going to end this post before I get too dramatic and unnecessarily upset.  But, these are very real emotions and struggles for me and I have to figure out a way to get past them.  If that means relocating to an area where I feel I can connect with the people and the tone of the culture and society in general, then I'll do it.  It's just so discouraging to never be able to discuss the things you care about, to be surrounded by people who are seemingly unconcerned with the harsh reality of our present situation, that don't see what a blind trajectory we are blazing along with foolish abandon.  We are so successfully distracted with our own infinitesimal daily routines and troubles... people refuse to think about a larger reality.  I could be branded as a loony just for using those two words together... LARGER REALITY.  And yet it's a truth that is strictly, almost forcibly ignored.  I need sustenance from people who want to expand boundaries and discover true human power.  Ahem, excuse me, LIFE power.  The power of the life force.  (OH NO, I'm getting really "transcendental," must..stop...while I'm... ahead).

Do your research, people.  Think critically, be imaginative, don't swallow the pill of media-based education.  TRUST NO ONE! (hehe. Ok, THAT was for dramatic flair).
But seriously.  Don't call someone "cynical" because they question the credibility of the flu shot.
(It's a scam, do a tiny PINCH of research, or even just think about it for three minutes, and you'll most likely see that).
Don't let them win!!! :):):)

And, on my end, I'll try to remain calm about the hopelessness of my current, infinitesimally small and minor unsatisfactory situation.

Final note- the life of that poor mouse on the sticky pad DID and DOES matter.  If I could go back in time, I would swallow my pride and make an actual effort to help him live.

The Anthropocene Story Map- or, How We've Ruined the Planet